When I was working with VOICES in the early 90's, I was part of a network of great people who had all come together to help make healing possible for themselves and others. There is a special kind of magic that happens when survivors and thriver's come together. When I started attending the conferences as a survivor and presenter, I grew by leaps and bounds. I couldn't explain it back then; I just knew it helped me so much. Now I have a better understanding of why going the conferences helped me.

First of all, I always thought I was the only one who has suffered abuse. It helped me so much to be together with other survivors because then I knew I wasn't the only one who had been hurt. I found I could identify with what so many people were saying. I was not the only one and therefore was not alone.

Then the validation I received from so many was so needed and appreciated at the time. It was so important to me, this validation that I secretly cried and cried inside myself (I never allowed myself to cry back then). I learned I didn't have to cry secretly, I could share my grief with others and still survive.

I had found inside myself a whole set of rules I had made while I was being abused to help me survive all the abuse. While I was there, I could see other people were doing what I would not allow myself to do and they were not dying (my biggest fear).

They were happy in spite of their pain and that amazed me. So many things amazed me at my first conference. The laughter we shared, the feeling of being together with a whole bunch of people like me was so healing to me. I brought my poems and shared them at the poetry corner along with other people. I was amazed I was being heard by others when I had been invisible for so long.

There were many other aspects of the conference that amazed me and helped me to grow.  Most of all, it was the coming together of all the survivors and listening to the different professionals and survivors/thriver's speak about their fields of expertise. I watched and watched the other survivors and watching them helped me to really understand there could be healing for the pain inside myself.

I know there can be the same healing for the pain in you if make the decision to take action and attend the conference. It will help, I can promise you that, if you allow it to help.

The choice is yours

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